Every day when I pick up my four-year-old daughter from preschool
she climbs into her back booster seat and says, Mom—tell me your story.
And almost every day I tell her: I dropped you off, I taught my class
I ate a tuna fish sandwich, wrote e-mails, returned phone calls, talked with students
and then I came to pick you up.
And almost every day I think, My God, is that what I did?
Yesterday, she climbed into the backseat and said, Mom
tell me your story, and I did what I always did:
I said I dropped you off
taught my class, had lunch, returned e-mails, talked with students…
And she said, No Mom, tell me the whole thing.
And I said, ok. I feel a little sad.
And she said, Tell me the whole thing Mom.
And I said, ok Elise died.
Elise is dead and the world feels weary and brokenhearted.
And she said, Tell me the whole thing Mom.
And I said, in my dream last night I felt my life building up around me and
when I stepped forward and away from it and turned around I saw a high
and frozen crested wave.
And she said, the whole thing Mom.
Then I thought of the other dream, I said, when a goose landed heavily on my head—
But when I’d untangled it from my hair I saw it wasn’t a goose but a winged serpent
writhing up into the sky like a disappearing bee.
And she said, Tell me the whole story.
And I said, Elise is dead, and all the frozen tears are mine of course
and if that wave broke it might wash my life clear,
and I might begin again from now and from here.
And I looked into the rearview mirror—
She was looking sideways, out the window, to the right
—where they say the unlived life is.
Ok? I said.
And she said, Ok, still looking in that direction
You keep these kids ignorant and then suddenly they’re in a situation that they don’t even have the words for and they have no idea what to do,” she says. “They’re not taught how to ask for consent, how to give consent, how to revoke consent and stop mid-way through. They don’t know to use protection or to demand it if it’s absent, they don’t know this will spread STIs and pregnancy. They don’t know it’s not supposed to hurt. Can you believe that? So, so, so many people think that sex is supposed to hurt the partner with a vagina when they have sex for the first time. They think that’s just the way it is, that’s just how it goes. *That* is obscene to me. Enforced ignorance that inevitably results in physical and emotional damage, *that’s* obscenity.
- Rich Goldstein asked me what I consider to be obscene in his article on my work, ‘Oh Joy Sex Toy’: The Internet’s Most Radical Sex-Fueled Comic Strip (via erikamoen)
This is just a little post to remind you that that dog. is/was goddamn amazing.
This message brought to you by nostalgia for the 90s (of all things), a drink made of whiskey I infused with some stuff based on the half-remembered instructions of a bartender in Brookline, some simple syrup I’m not sure is good anymore, and lemons, and also I guess the fact that it’s past 11 and I have basically grandpa sleeping hours now.
- starfleet: we're glad you're home
- starfleet: we've been reviewing your records
- janeway: k when is my promotion
- starfleet: what makes you think you're getting a promotion
- janeway: my future self told me all about it when she broke the temporal prime directive and brought me stolen future technology
- starfleet: yeah so in that vein there are some things we need to discuss
- janeway: if there's a problem with the paperwork blame chakotay
- janeway: i don't do forms i do holographic irish bartenders and former borg drones
- doctor: i can assure you that while in the delta quadrant we conducted ourselves with grace and dignity according to the highest principles of starfleet
- b'elanna: yeah step off our balls you weren't there you don't know
- tom: yeah you weren't there that time we stole a keg of omega molecules from some douchebag aliens who were going to blow up the quadrant
- harry: or that time we played space nascar and ended up in the center of a terrorist plot
- tom: or that time we were all super horny and built a fake irish city so that we could get drunk and laid
- harry: or when we tied that guy to a chair and waited for the aliens to eat him because he wouldn't tell us what we wanted to know
- tom: oh shit remember that time i got 30 days for ignoring the wishes of some foreign government and destroying their mining operation
- harry: that was almost as crazy as the time you restored that old shuttle but then it fell in love with you and tried to kill b'elanna
- b'elanna: speaking of which remember when that bomb i made for the maquis came back and tried to kill us
- chakotay: that reminds me of when seska stole my dna and tried to impregnate herself with my child
- tom: nothing will ever compare to the time me and the captain had kids and left them on that planet
- janeway: we were young and innocent then
- tom: how many lizard years to a human year i feel like i should send a birthday card
- janeway: like 6
- tom: you don't even know you're just saying that
- janeway: you should talk you're such an absent father
- tom: oh no you didn't
- janeway: i didn't even want kids
- starfleet: is there a reason you stenciled PARTY BUS on the side of voyager
- janeway: is there a reason i shouldn't have